A Quest For Carrots

I hope everyone is well. I haven’t written in months, though I have wanted too. Perhaps an Apology is due? My Blog experiment, has focused on the limits of expression. After several years of research, I have now entered another Phase. I did find some limits. Often the study of history leads to difficult data, and discussions (or lack thereof). In 1990 a Quaker taught me, “that person speaks my voice”. I often live somewhat vicariously, both as a Sound Engineer, and a Producer. Though I worked on my first Stage Crew, when I was 12, did parts in Plays in Middle, High School, and College, I’ve tended to see myself as a Carpenter. That is changing, since closing by business, (1996 – 2012). As a General Contractor, I crafted the desires of others, into enduring structures and services. For complex reasons, mostly having to do with where I saw the need, rather than profit, I focused mainly on older houses. I am glad I did. Providing Sound, recording, and helping Artists, is in large part, how I participate in the Arts. There are times however, when I want more. I am not a stranger to the Stage, though more at home plugging in mics, than using them. I did read a poem from Charles Krafft on Stage, last May. I have mentioned that working with Musicians has made me try harder to be neutral politically. I have provided Sound for diverse audiences, sometimes there has been a political focus, though I don’t campaign for any candidates, or Party. I try to treat folks equally on Stage, though I influence the overall volume, I try and not turn anyone down for expressing their opinion. Occasionally, I have turned people way down, for getting too loud, or violent. I recall an Artist knocking over a barstool, some months ago, and I turned him way down, to say, NO, and he got it, along with a warning from the bartender, and away we went, Rocking On! A friend, who died this year, was famous for going over the top, at times, and we struggled some, with balance, making music together. I turned him down, when too loud, soaking up too much energy and attention for the gathering(s). Not exactly a science, there is trust inherent, with providing Sound. I am protecting more than ears getting injured. The greatest struggles are off Stage. I have some skill at Networking. I like people. I love helping make music. The last 10 years, has been a treasure, which may well take years to reveal. I have recorded a lot (An Understatement) of music, poetry and nature. I am lucky to know many Artists in the Northwest, I network with my peers, and I try and learn from everybody. I have been transitioning, for several years, from the Construction Trades, to working in Music. Computers have been a bridge for me, finding ways to express my love of science, and finding a way to participate, in the process. I hate feeling left out. I struggle with not feeling I am contributing enough. I keep trying to learn history, language and all things digital. Although I am building Equity, in my house, I’d like to earn a living. I make enough to afford to go out, buy some drinks, tip my bartenders, and occasionally buy new underwear and socks. Though I have some savings, my Partner, has been paying more bills than I am comfortable with. I like to bring home the tofu too. I have a habit of reading more than one book at a time. Once I start a book, (at a point) I do try and finish. I read mostly non fiction. I got things to do. This man can only multitask, so much. There are many subjects I am interested in. [I mention a couple of good non fiction books I finished this year in the Post Script; blink by Malcolm Gladwell (thanks Carl), and Salt: A World History by Mark Kurlansky (thanks Lisa D).] At the risk of trying to construct a theme, and/or message, other than I am looking for work; I was hoping to address some issues, I am not hearing. I am somewhat amazed, how quietly my Country lost the war with Iraq this year. After how many lives killed, millions of people displaced, how much bloody $ (spent and missing), and yet at least, four Divisions of Troops quit, and all those weapons… And yet, somehow, the bombs are being built and used, by people, who say they are against pollution, global warming, and for health care. We need to build peace. Let’s talk about health care. It feels like a tax to me. It doesn’t feel much like Care. I thought it might be something like Driving Insurance, though with some focus on Tune Ups. At least with Auto Insurance, there is an understanding of what is covered, what is not, as well as one’s rights and responsibilities. I am spending more on health insurance, than I have been earning, for a couple years. I haven’t gone to the Doctor, (and rarely have as an adult) since Basic Health ended in WA State a couple of years ago. My rates went up, and my coverage went down, under the Affordable Health Care Act. It was difficult to get, lots of hoops, forms, and loops. And after a year, it went up by over 30%. I see how well, Supply and Demand is working. Well, at least I am not in prison, and millions of people are. I like being free, don’t get me wrong. I am lucky, I have some $ in savings. I have a good partner. whose Health Care is part of her work compensation. I am not after a free ride. I feel though, that access to Health Care, is way too difficult for many Adults. Fortunately, it is more available for children. I’d like to contribute, not only provide for my family, I’d like to help, in so many ways. And yet, I don’t feel like I am making a living. I have many skills. I like to work. No doubt much of my struggles, are self inflicted. Darwin may well give me the boot, and I will have to look for an ice flow to retire on. I hope it won’t come to doing Ice Studies in the Artic, though I have taken an interest in Glacial Modeling Software, this may not be the time to discuss it. Sometimes I feel as though I ought to focus on Music, the Local Scene, Tech Talk, etc, and not worry about the Bigger Picture. And yet, I know I am not alone with struggles. Many gifted Artists are having difficulty earning a living. Music may be good for our health, though it rarely provides health care. Poets, Painters, I could go on… I mention these Artists, though I need to recognize the patrons, promoters and producers; The Supporters of the Arts. I will try and use more names. I have some concerns about the Crowd Funding Phenomena; perhaps it has its place. However, I think we need more relationships and fewer crowds. Do we really need to put 15% of the pie into software Apps that manage said fund raising? While this is less than the State taxes on alcohol, both influence, those working in the Arts. The relationship of alcohol and music is rather old. I have written of their history previously, and I look forward to researching this further. And yet, this year, our community, has experienced deaths though heart attacks, chronic illness, and suicides. We keep going. We try and keep up. We have a lot of good gatherings. Though, part of me, wants to make it easier to dance. I am trying to help. I want to thank the many souls who are contributing, considering one another, and negotiating possibilities, for everyone. Thanks, R.A. Hull November 29Th, 2014

PS I wrote the bulk of this Blog several weeks ago. I almost stuck it in my collection of Drafts… Part of why I decided to publish, is for better or worse, I discovered the MRM (Men’s Rights Movement). It was an accident. I have many aforementioned research projects, as well as my “spare time literary habits”. I try to be careful. Although I don’t try to seek conflict (as a rule) I do try and hear many perspectives. My Father in Law, and I, have gotten in several arguments, over the last 20 plus years. That doesn’t mean I don’t respect him. Our backgrounds are rather different. He reads a lot of non fiction, and is generous with his library. I borrowed the book blink by Malcolm Gladwell. The book makes a powerful argument for the ability of the brain, to make snap judgments, also called “thin slicing”. The title of the book comes from this; however, our brains can get in the way. We experience life, with unique perspectives, insights, and difficulties. He also studied Police Shootings, which has value to all concerned with avoiding tragic mistakes. Too much information can delay, and reduce the quality of choices. Kurlansky examines examples, from Archeology, to Speed Dating, the power available, in a “blink”. All of us have limitations, however temporary, which can influence objectivity. Marketing has made quick impressions, nearly a science. It can be a dark art. The Carrot, may not know the way. I posted a link to a video, a satire of Princess Laya, walking the streets of New York, being cat called by Star Wars characters. I thought it was well done. I soon learned more about its inspiration, and well, that is how I met Karen Straughan (Known as the Gateway Drug to Men’s Issues). Life is different now. Everything is in flux; I am thinking about ideas accepted for decades. I will say this: The banning of Men’s Centers on several Campuses, in 2012 and 2013, was perhaps, the best thing that could have happened to the Men’s Movement. Short of recognition, forbidding men to gather, and talk, was  guaranteed to make it grow. Men’s Rights Associations are now on over 50 Campuses in the United States and Canada. The Men’s Issues Conference: The Male Student in Peril at KSUM, this November, was a damn good start. Many good talks, and Q&A Sessions occurred, and was documented. Speakers were as diverse as Naomi Wolfe to Karen Straughan. Dr. Janice Famengo was perhaps the most controversial Speaker, her appearances have been protested, and disrupted in Toronto and Ottawa; although soft spoken, her re-examination of Data on Domestic Violence from Canada and the USA, is changing everything. Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) is nearly equal between men and women. Paul Elam of A Voice for Men said it took over 70 years for Suffragettes, to get the vote. Men and boys will be included in Gender Studies, sooner than that if, we mind our Manners. Change is often slow, though sometimes, it happens in a blink. Please take me with a grain of salt. I enjoyed Salt, by Mark Kurlansky. I was surprised to learn, Salt production, was perhaps humanities first Industry. Salt trade is thought to be older than agriculture, the making of bread, or its cousin, beer. I do wonder if Mammoths were hunted within hierarchies, though it can be argued that Salt was the first catalyst for the organization of world trade. It influenced the roots of mining, fishing, and the domestication of animals. There is even a chapter about the US Civil War, called the War between the Salts. There is so much to learn! Thanks for bearing with me, as I ramble on. Stay real, R.A.Hull